Nerfenstein Blaster Mods & Props Terms & Conditions
If you’re commissioning something from Nerfenstein be sure you’ve read this as you will be asked for agreement PRIOR to work starting on your prop / art piece. She wants your time together to be meaningful and good, not some weird shotgun wedding that ends in a messy divorce. We’re aiming for walks along the beach and pina colada’s in the rain.. with an umbrella.
These Terms and Conditions are a contract between Nerfenstein (the artist) and you (I’m sure you have an awesome name – the consumer). It is a legally binding agreement between both parties… did someone say parties.. break out the streamers!
Deposit of Money for Goods and Services
You want Nerfenstein to make or mod something for you? That’s AWESOME! She needs a 50% non-refundable deposit before she starts. This is because ass-hats have commissioned her and disappeared (awful right?). We’re sure you’re not an ass-hat, but it’s a blanket rule now as ass-hats are like ninja’s, you don’t know they’re there until it’s too late! The 50% non-refundable deposit comes off the final amount (i.e. you’ll only owe half at the end +P&P). Non-refundable means you won’t get it back, even if you hate and want to return the item or burn it in hellfire. The deposit is to pay for materials purchased and time lost on the project. Makes sense right? Nerfenstein doesn’t have a time-machine, which is a shame. As much as she’d love to work for people for nothing, she’s got bills just like you… she has said if she wins the lotto she will make props for free, just to be nice, but that hasn’t happened yet, we’ll let you know if that changes. Right.. next!
Handmade with Human Hands
You understand Nerfenstein makes handmade stuff right? If you’re expecting factory precision you are more than welcome to purchase Nerfenstein a laser cutter… she REALLY wants one, but alas only has a scroll saw and two human hands, regular ones, not superhuman ones. Items are also hand painted with the same human hands (they really are human.. this we swear). This means no two items are exactly the same, because Nerfenstein is not a miracle worker / God like being (see HUMAN comments above). Upside you are purchasing a one of a kind prop or mod, none of this 1 of 5000 for you, no siree Bob, you’re special! One of one all the way.
Come At Me Bro!
If you have an issue, email Nerfenstein or message her on one of those modern type social network things. She’s a nice gal and uses her fingers to reply, she even uses words like please, thank you and shucks. Once we saw her use the word discombobulate, but that doesn’t happen often. Communication is key and that ain’t no pettifogger speaking! You’re going to Google pettifogger aren’t you? ;p
Postage / Evil Customs
The commissioning party must pay all postage costs incurred. Nerfenstein only charges what postage actually costs, plus materials (boxes, tape etc), no inflated postage prices here, no siree bob! Of course if customs takes it, shakes it, plays with it in their office while they’re on a break (you know they do), then charge you extra because they did, that’s on you too. It will be marked as gift, because it is a gift of skill from one human to another, but that means nothing because customs are the devil. If customs keep it, Nerfenstein is under no obligation to replace the item, nor issue a refund. Likewise if it’s on a boat that sinks, plane that goes down or is stolen by angry postal service staff or delivered to the wrong address because the post-person can’t read or has a heavy hangover and just can’t be assed (flinging parcels wildly on anyone’s lawn, so long as they’re within a hundred mile radius). At time of writing these T&Cs everything sold has made it to the correct recipients all over the globe, hopefully you won’t be the first!
The Sh-t Happens Clause
On the rare occurrence that a prop cannot be finished (hundreds sold and it hasn’t happened yet!), the commissioner will get a full refund of payments received. This is to cover for accident, injury, zombie apocalypse or other unforeseen things that might force an end to a project prior to completion on the side of the artist (not the purchaser). This clause is not connected to Deposit of Money for Goods and Services, it is a separate entity, it is the Luke, to the Yoda. Basically if Nerfenstein is trapped due to illness or zombie apocalypse and can’t finish your prop, you’ll get monies paid returned to you. If you get sick or are trapped by brain eating zombies, that won’t affect your purchase, no refund for you, but let’s face it, that’s no big deal, the zombies are probably going to get you anyway.
Materials / Radioactivity
Nerfenstein sometimes uses materials like Bondo, filler, glues, paints, screws, nails, lead, plutonium and other things that might be deemed nasty. We jest, she never uses plutonium, but you never can tell what’s in anything these days can you?! Point being if you break something open and ingest, cut yourself, or in anyway injure yourself with a Nerfenstein art piece (broken or otherwise), it’s on you, not her. We don’t have to tell you this, because you’re smart, but just in case: it’s all on you if you hurt yourself or anyone else. Nerfenstein says ALWAYS wear protective eyewear when playing with things that fire missiles, whether that’s a submarine, tank or Nerf / Air blaster. Safety first!
3D Printed Items
Just a note about 3D printed items as this is a growth area. With 3D printing in relative infancy, 3D prints still feature 3D print lines and texture. Nerfenstein will do her best to fill and smooth items, however print lines may still exist. Raw 3D print orders will feature the print lines / texture. This information is added for those people who imagine 3D prints are like porcelain, or a baby’s bottom. Wierdo’s. Also some 3D print material can crack. At time of writing these T&C’s that has never happened, but then Nerfenstein only uses the expensive premium filament, so maybe that’s why. On the off chance something cracks… bollocks, but you’re not covered if it left her in good condition.. which it always will.
FOAMIDABLES! They’re squishy, but they’re good!
Nerfenstein specializes in foam props, she’s called these “Foamidables”, because she’s a creative genius *cough* and likes portmanteaus. Foam props are – unsurprisingly – made of foam, this means with wear / when bent paintwork may crack. It might seem an obvious thing, but some people don’t realize. Foam can be painted to look like metal, leather or whatever you need, but do keep in mind the bendy /squishy thing. Foam props are convention safe and lighter to post. BONUS! Oh and foam is all hand cut with human hands, so don’t be expecting laser precision or you’ll feel let down. Made lots, no complaints yet! Check them out in the Foamidables section.
Toy / Action Figure Repaints
You pay for the toy / figure in question, it’s not part of the repaint price (which is for the paint, brushes, detail items, tapes and time). I’ll sand it back with high quality sandpaper and paint it to your specifications. No returns or refunds, the hours still count. Of course if you hate it and have a time machine, I’m happy for you to use it so all those hours are recouped and you can then have a refund.
A Girls Prerogative
Nerfenstein may vary these Terms and Conditions at any time, though it’s doubtful that will happen, because they were a pain in the ass to write and she was sad she was forced to do them in the first place. Still, you can never be too sure, a girls prerogative and all that.
By making a purchase from Nerfenstein, you agree to be bound by the Terms and Conditions as they stand at the time of your purchase.